MTC Week 6 (Last MTC Letter)

Hey mom!

I just have a minute to write... PERO (BUT) I just wanted to tell you I love you and I'm so excited to get to talk to you tomorrow.  I'm having a wonderful time.  I hope you know that - I hope like my letters aren't complaining the whole time because I've had SUCH a wonderful experience here. I hope I've grown a little at least. haha. Our flight is at 7. I'll call you early tomorrow.  No idea what time. Sometime between 5-6:30. 

Mom, I'm going to be a real missionary tomorrow. What is happening? haha. I feel like my testimony has grown so much- and I feel like I have A LOT more to learn and a LOT of room to grow. Also, ask me how much spanish I know. Not enough to hold a conversation. PERO, I know that if I give my best effort and not get discouraged that the Lord will help me and make me enough. I know it sounds weird though, but sometimes I think about the Atonement, and I'm like- Wait. I can use that. And the Lord never gives up on us- if we think it's "too late" that's not the Lord that's telling us that at all. I'm just like- wait. I can repent and be better and it's possible and there's not a God up there saying "heh. Nice try... but it's not going to work." But there's actually a God whose "Hand is stretched out still" always. What. Is this. This is like- the happiest message of all time. I'm so so so so so so so so excited. And a little nervous. But yeah. I don't even know what to expect honestly mom. Hermana Green alluded it to being on a roller coaster and knowing that the drop is coming up but you can't see what it looks like or how steep it is yet. That's how I feel. I have no idea what to expect or how prepared I am. It just doesn't seem real. Haha.

Anyway, TALK to you tomorrow!

Love ya!
Hermana Johnson.

MTC Week 5

This is MY FAVORITE picture.

blonde= Hermana Green

redhead= Hermana Scott

brunette= Hermana Dorian

 

My District

 

 

Mom,

 

How are you!? I love you so much! Happy late mother's day!

No one emailed me this week so if you want you can get a good long email. haha. I don't know what to write about though... like nothing has happened this week. Well lots of things have happened, but I don't know what specifically to tell you about! And I don't know if I can remember everything. Haha. Or anything.

Anyway! How are you? And Brant's done with the play... bummer! Tell him not to watch duck dynasty too much- haha. How's Grandma Goodrich?

Mom, this time next week I'm going to be a real missionary. Speaking Spanish and telling people about this gospel. This is real life. I can't believe it!

Our flight is at 7:15 AM ... so I'll probably call you before that... at six sometime. I honestly have no idea. We've got to get to our travel office at 4 AM ... it's going be a long day.

PERO, Mom, it has been so great. Like- I can't wait til I'm in Texas and really get to see these people and just really love them and LOSE myself in this work. I just.. I'm just bad at teaching and speaking Spanish and the whole works. I'm just not good at it at all. Haha. I just feel like I need to stop worrying so much and be as obedient as I can be and pray to be filled with charity and just "Go forth with Faith" This is the Lord's work, He called me and He will qualify me, and He didn't send me here to fail. And He believes in me! I really do think He looks at me for my strengths and is patient with my weaknesses. Like Elder Holland said- He's only worked with imperfect people.

So guess what!? Janice Kapp Perry came on Sunday! We just sang a medley of her primary songs and it was awesome! There's such a power in music! Speaking of- I got a calling as music coordinator ... but then I just realized I won't be here for much longer (AH!) ... but it was awesome cuz I got to choose the music in sacrament. I love music so so so so so so much. Anyway, yeah, that was awesome!

My teacher has talked to me a lot about weaknesses... that they're given to us by God and that they're not a sin. So... that's good. I have become a lot better at prayers. Even on the days I feel just kinda really down I can go and talk with God and things feel so much better. It's like- different in the MTC! I have to remind myself that this is the same gospel that I've had my entire life- it almost seems different. I know that sounds weird, but the gospel itself isn't different, just the way it's presented is a little bit. And I guess when I feel it the most and have that desire to share it is really when I think about how much happiness it has brought to us. Like- our family and me personally to just know that there's always hope and that God always has a plan for us. We're never too far gone that the Atonement won't reach us. Isn't that great!? Jesus Christ descended below it all so that we can always have someone to turn to. That right there has brought me so much comfort, and I know it has for you too. Mom, like- I just wonder all the time, how did you do what you did? How did you have so much faith and trust in the Lord through that ... not gonna lie ROUGH part of your life. You've just had so many trials but you've never lost the faith. I feel like every time I go through something hard it's God trying to punish me, but ... that's not the God I know. Like- I guess it's just hard to try and make that connection of God's love for me, even when I feel like no one else does or no one else sees the good in me.

I literally DREAM of being that missionary that President Monson talked about. I want to be that kind of person, someone that just looks past everything and straight to the heart. And just love the heck out of people. That's what I want to do SO BADLY! And I just want to love people because I want to, not cuz I have to. Which is kinda what it feels like here "Love cuz you have to" ... mmmmm not good. When I really think about the Atonement, and the Savior, it's like- that kind of pure love and joy he has for me, just like I do for you guys. Like, sure, we all have our weaknesses and our quirks but I barely even notice them cuz I see how great we are, and I just love you guys! I just hope He sees that in me. Because I KNOW I have that potential. I know with His help I can do anything. I'm not gonna lie, I still have a hard time trusting Him with ALL MY HEART  and I don't know why! I just feel like life is so full of ups and downs and I have to remember that God's love is unchanging. He feels that about everyone! The love He has is forever!

Thank you so so so so much for everything you've done for me and everything you continue to do for me.  I think about you all every single day. I love you I love you I love you!!!

Keep writing! The best is to hear from you!

Love you!

Hermana Johnson

MTC Week 4

Hey hey!

 

Okay. So. This week. First. Let me just tell you how embarassing my life is. Okay?

 

So once upon a time in our lesson with "Stefan" we were following up about our commitment that we had him do- which was to read about the First Vision. He was like "Naaah... I didn't do it." And we were like "Okay! We'll do it with you right now!"  PS- ALL of our lessons are in Spanish. So I open up my Spanish BoM and ask him to read JSH 1:11-20. And he starts to read it. And I'm like "Strange... usually I know at least half of what's going on but I don't understand a word he's saying." ... turns out I had him read Moses 1:11-20. I had him read 9 verses that had nothing to do with what we were talking about. And when we found out we were all laughing so hard we couldn't teach. It was so embarassing/hillarious.

 

Also, I said "Me gusta su faulda." (Significa: I like your skirt.) ..... to an Elder. I was trying to tell him I liked his tie. Epic fail. And it was a Spanish speaking Elder. Even better.

 

I've realized, and I'm not sure if you've noticed this. No, I know you have. Everything I'm thinking in my brain shows on my face. And I just realized this week about how I must look when people are speaking spanish to me. I have this kinda confused trying-to-figure-it-out-look... I probably have my mouth hanging open... anyway, we were at TRC - which is Hermana Dorian and I's favorite probably just cuz the people are themselves and they're so great. We taught the CUTEST old man. Like the kind that's like "back in the Korean War..." He was just a tease and super talkative. Anyway, he was in the middle of telling us a story. And he stops. He looks at me and says in Spanish "How much of what I'm saying do you understand?" And I was so thrown off by the question I go "Huh?" And he turns to Hermana Dorian and asks, "How many years of Spanish did you take?" 3. "Will you translate what I'm saying to her?" Hahahahahah! Suuuuuper great.

 

Before him though we taught Elder Baxter. He is like 50 and general authority looking. Just a man with light in his eyes if that makes sense. Anyway, what we were supposed to teach about was prayer. Of course in Spanish and of course they don't tell us til like 5 minutes before we go teach. So I pulled out Enos and we read a little through that. He talked about like- how we have to have faith in the words that the Lord says, which made me think of another scripture in Ether 3 I think, where before the Lord shows the Brother of Jared like- EVERYTHING- he first asks him "Believe thou the words which I shall speak?" and Elder Baxter just starts laughing at how true it is. And I dunno- we just talked about the importance of prayer, and I testified about how much it has helped me in my life especailly since being here, and Hermana Dorian. K, this girl is great. She just goes to testify about how important it was in her life and just starts crying. I dunno-  even though we don't speak Spanish very well, the Spirit is really the one that speaks. We're seriously learning two languages here: Spanish and the Spirit. Elder Baxter shared with us a good friend of his that was an alcolholic for twelve years and just decided to pray one day. At his lowest point. He said he could literally feel the comforting arms of the Savior surrounding him. We were all crying. It was awesome.

 

Oh! Something I've wanted to tell you since day one!

 

 

Hermana Johnson and the Mormon Message Connection:

 

Go look up Stay Within the Lines. The main Elder in that video "Elder Wood" is in  my zone! Super embarassing I went up to him on the first day and asked him why he looked so familiar. Uhm... he's on a mormon message video that I've watched a dozen times. That's why. He is the FUNNIEST kid ever. So animated. And people stop him all the time and are like "Hey! You're that guy!" It's great.

 

Also: "Same Jersey, Different Team." Guess who was one of the Sisters that taught that kid? Hermana Mackay, my teacher. She is seriously THE GREATEST. She inspires me. So glad we're related. Haha. She's the blonde with the curly hair at the end of the video in the group shot. I wanna say she's wearing a blue polo or something. Anyway, it's a great video. So you should look it up!

 

 

Yesterday we learned about the power of the Spirit in Conversion. And like- it really is the Spirit that's does it all- we don't do anything! We even practiced it with someone from our district, I was with Hermana Green (Love her!) and she was the investigator and I was the missionary. And Hermana Mackay's like "Okay, I want you to find out why your investigators aren't getting answers to their prayers." Dah! okay. But the coolest thing is- I just did what I could, and followed the Spirit and I could feel Him guiding me in the questions I asked and He helped me to listen to her and to understand her. I ... fail at explaining but... yeah. Afterwards both Hna Green and I look at each other and were like "That. Was. Awesome!" And Hna Mackay looked at me and says "Hermana Johnson, you have NOTHING to worry about." Die happy. It made me super pumped to get out in the feild and help the people of Houston. Cuz it's not going to be anything I say or anything I do. It's all about helping them recongnize the Lord's hand in their lives, and help them feel of His Spirit and His love for them. So excited!

 

We did sealings this morning! The coolest experience ever. I couldn't help but think about all you - and how much I love you! And... I know it's totally okay I say this cuz Elder Holland said it, but it really wouldn't be heaven if you guys weren't there. Mom, I'm so grateful you and Dad did it the right way. I'm so glad to have been born with the blessings I have been born with. I realize how much God loves us. And how much He wants us to love! And there is no end to glory! There is no end to love! It's like- there's no end to progression at all. I don't know. I know I'm not making any sense. But there it is. :) I LOVE YOU GUYS! I feel so blessed to have the family that I do. So blessed. And I feel so blessed with this opportunity to help other families have that promise of forever too.

 

If there's anything that I've learned this week it's that God answers prayers. Everytime. Even the ones in our hearts. Even the ones that can't be realized for a while. He even answers them when we don't notice that He's answering them. But I know that He is listening, and He is guiding us as long as we're doing what we're supposed to be doing. I don't think we even notice it half the time! But He is always there! So I guess I would invite you guys to pray with a prayer of faith, with the knowledge that God will answer you because I know that He will. We don't find the things we're not looking for. So pray. And look. Because maybe God's answering you and you don't even realize.

 

Anyway, I love you!! Dios les ama tambien!

 

Hermana Johnson

MTC Week 3

Hola!!!!!

This week has been CRAZY! I have so much to tell you and like- no time to tell you everything.

On Tuesday we had this thing called TRC- where we actually got to teach real people that just were being themselves. And they're members. And it was awesome! They were the cutest older people and I could just see how much the gospel had blessed their lives.

Our "Investigators" are actually our teachers that are being their own past investigators, which is super great cuz they know how to help us, but it's hard to not internally analyze yourself about everything you're doing. BUT. It still is a way cool experience. Hermana Mackay (PS I found out how she's related to us. I wrote it down. I'll let you know) had an investigator, Candy, who is who she is pretending to be right now for us. And we all got in our lesson and were like "Hi Candy. How are you? Good. We've got a message for you." And she was super ... closed off I guess. We couldn't get any response out of her at all. we're like- your family is forever! Her: "I know." We're like "Read the book of Mormon!" she's like- I have. And I go to church. And.... everything. We're kind of like "Great! How did you feel!?" "Normal." *Head bang against the wall.* I'm not explaining it very well... But just like- she just told us what we wanted to hear kind of, and none of us connected with her.  Anyway, Hermana Mackay comes in class and says "I feel like you all are a little frustrated with Candy." And we were like... yeah. She was like "Candy was one of the 3 hardest investigators I had." And then she told us that Candy reflected the lack of sincerity that we showed in her. She said "Candy doesn't trust any of you. She doesn't know anything about you, you don't know anything about her. Why would she tell you anything?" And it really opened my eyes! I've always thought... I mean. I'm not the best teacher ever or anything, but I've always thought, "Why would anyone care about what I have to say if they didn't think I cared about them, if I didn't have their best interests at heart?" That's something I've always believed and I feel like I threw it out the window when I came here. I feel like I threw everything out the window. haha. But it totally hit me in the face that Charity is SO important to missionary work. It's important to life. It's important to salvation. It's like- THE most important thing you can have "And faith, hope charity and love with an eye single to the glory of God qualify him for the work." (d&c 4:... something :) )

So that was eye opener numero uno. Another one came as I was talking to one of the elders in my district.

Tangent! The elders in my district are the greatest!!! They are seriously the strongest group of men I have ever seen. I love them all... like brothers cuz they're younger than I am and ... yeah. Anyway... one day I'll tell you about them all individually. They inspire me though. Seriously.

Anyway!! I was talking to Elder Truman from Kansas City Missouri. He told me like- his whole conversion story. Do you remember the story that Pres Monson told a few conferences ago about the cultural celebration for the temple and how the jumbotron stopped working and so all the youth prayed together ... and then it was fixed! Well guess who was one of those youth? Elder Truman! Anyway, he told me about that, and all the other times that God had saved him, and how much He had helped him get to this point in His life. And then he invited me to do the same. "I want you to just take fifteen minutes tonight and think about all the ways that God has got you here today. And I want you to think of all the ways that He has been in your life TODAY. And if you can't think of anything, then get on your knees and ask. And He's gonna show you."

So I did. I thought about it all. And I don't think I even got it all. But I thought about all the little things, and the influences that I've had to get me here today. I thought about you, our family, my incredible friends, my EFY kids and counselors, all the people in my life that have been blessing to me, the opportunity I got to work in the temple, the challenges that have prepared me to be here, the influence the gospel has been in my life. I thought about it all. And I just started crying. haha. I seriously haven't cried since I've been here- I feel like I'm still in shock. I just realized how merciful and how great the Lord has been to me, even since being here. I still feel like I don't grasp it all, but it was still such an eye-opening experience. I seriously invite you to try it because it will change your life.

Lesson numero dos. haha. No, I seriously can't write everything! I wish I could! I just was talking with Hermana Green and she's like- the sweetest girl ever (and super cool... look up devinsupertramp on youtube... yeah. Those are her friends. She does that stuff) And she was like- how are you doing?? And here I'm usually clear up on cloud nine or brinking on emotional breakdown haha  and at this point it was the latter so I just told her. I'm like " I feel like I'm hitting a wall. With my comp, with the language, with the gospel, with everything." And she's like "I felt like that too... and then I realized I just needed to let go and trust the Lord." And I totally realized that's exactly what I needed to do. And so that day in personal study I read about the Brother of Jared and faith and I just cried. just cried. I feel so much like - I'm just scared! About everything all the time! I read about the disciples on the ship before I came here and they're all like "Master, carest thou not that we perish?" This boat is gonna flip!! We gone die. And he asks them a question that I need to ask myself every day. "Where is your faith?"

Helaman 5:12. If ye build on the rock, ye cannot fall.

 

Ooooh! I love you!! The church is true!

La iglesia es verdadera!!!

 

Love you!

Hermana JohnsonA